Saturday, July 31, 2010

It only hurts for a minute.

Friday, July 30, 2010

On Friday, a 34 week pregnant woman came in for a wax. She said she felt fat, hot, uncomfortable and hairy. She was a real trooper as I groomed her engorged lady parts. That night she delivered healthy twin girls. She left the sweetest message on my answering machine over the weekend thanking me for grooming her for the delivery. She said it made her feel a lot better. Just another example of my ability to spread joy, one vagina at a time.

Thursday, July 29, 2010

Wool sweaters are gross when they are wet.

Wednesday, July 28, 2010

Okay, this is my 100Th post. Aren't you dying to know what all this buzz about a bald beave is really about?

Tuesday, July 27, 2010

Praise a Pretty Pussy!

Monday, July 26, 2010

A lint free set of lips get licked more.

Sunday, July 25, 2010

You don't have to be young
To get this done.
Just give me five
And your puss will thrive!

Saturday, July 24, 2010

Set a new personal record this week. Did my oldest client. She was 75.

Friday, July 23, 2010

One of my clients recently moved to the area and has been frustrated with this whole dating scene in Rochester. She finally met a great guy at church and things have been progressing beautifully over the past month. A few days ago, they were getting down and dirty and she abruptly told him that they had to wait a little longer. Well, of course they had to wait. She had pubic hair growing half way down her leg! She told me yesterday that she was so nervous that I might be out of town or not working, because she couldn't hold off much longer. Glad I was here for you girl.

Thursday, July 22, 2010

I can understand getting brush burned during soccer, not during sex. Toss the razor.

Wednesday, July 21, 2010

Question of the week from a young brunette. Why does it look like the tips of my hair are white when they grow in? I'm not completely sure but it is not as uncommon as you may think. My thought is that since the hair comes in finer and thinner, the ends aren't as dense so therefore don't have the same amount of pigment in them. You aren't a freak and you aren't alone. I've seen it before. I like to tease and say that you have a highlighted hoo-ha. And no, I don't think you are going grey yet although it will turn grey at some point. Rest assured, you don't have an old pussy.

Tuesday, July 20, 2010

I am probably the most over educated wax tech you'll ever meet. Although I didn't need a Master's Degree to do this for a living, I think it makes it easier for me to talk to women from all sorts of backgrounds. And although I am diligent when it comes to keeping my sources anonymous, it may surprise you who has the most fascinating pussy stories or crazy sexual antidotes. I have a chapter in the book entitled "Crazy Shit People Tell Me" which regurgitates dozens of funny things that people have said to me over the years. All the blog entries, however, are new material.

A woman from a white collared profession asked me what the "No Scream Creme" was for. I told her it numbs the area to make it less painful when I wax. She said "No thank you! I don't want anything numbing my girl!"

Monday, July 19, 2010

I watch you undress. Skid marks on your panties makes me nervous about touching you naked.

Sunday, July 18, 2010

I try hard not to pass judgement, but when your hair on your hoo-ha is long enough to braid...

Saturday, July 17, 2010

Waxing is liberating. Kind of like going commando.

Friday, July 16, 2010

Would you rather play on stucco or silk? Stop shaving.

Thursday, July 15, 2010

I thought going into the bush meant going to Australia.

Wednesday, July 14, 2010

Two sisters were in the room together and the one on the table said she couldn't take the pain. The sister not getting waxed asked her what she was going to do when she had a baby? She said that by the time she was ready, they'd have a new system.

Tuesday, July 13, 2010

Just a reminder. Tell your friends. A happy hoo-ha is a hair free hoo-ha.

Monday, July 12, 2010

It helps to have a little flexibility when I am trying to wax down under. A young girl with some very tight hamstrings said "I am not very flexible. I feel sorry for all the guys who try to have sex with me."

Sunday, July 11, 2010

I asked a woman "when was the last time you had sex?"

She replied, "alone? or with someone else?"

Saturday, July 10, 2010

OK new girl, you gave me a great blog yesterday when you told me your man prefers hardwood to Berber. Priceless!

Friday, July 9, 2010

In this unusually hot weather, please spend a little extra time primping your pussy before you come to see me.

Thursday, July 8, 2010

Don't be scared. No one will judge you. Become a follower.
Even though a Brazilian refers to the removal of all the pubic & rectal hair, many women leave a landing strip. This is often done to help the men figure out where to land.

Wednesday, July 7, 2010

In the 1970's a pretty racy book that included illustrations was written called the "Joy of Sex." Back then, pubic grooming wasn't common. It was a more natural era.

A girl came into the room and before she even undressed, she said it had been a couple months since she had been in and she apologized for her Joy of Sex.

Tuesday, July 6, 2010

Don't ever feel weird or embarrassed about getting undressed in front of me. I've seen it all. For example, now that I have become so busy, I have more ladies who are obese. It's a lot easier for me to get to their parts and I am glad to give them that same sexy feeling between their legs that we all love.

There have been a few instances, however, where I haven't been able to get to a woman's hoo-ha due to her size. About a month ago, I had a woman bring her sister in the room with her for moral support. Fortunately, her sister was able to hold her thighs apart for me so I could wax her thoroughly, because there was no way I was going to be able to do it without some help. I couldn't have done it without her and, happy to say, the woman left with a beautifully bald beave.

It's all about a happy ending.

Monday, July 5, 2010

Brazilians make you feel cleaner and that's important, especially if you have an active sex life.

One of my clients told me she doesn't like to have dirty sex. Some kind of clean up should follow each round. No leftovers. Agreed.

Sunday, July 4, 2010

Twat is fun to say.

Saturday, July 3, 2010

Getting a Brazilian can make things much more comfortable between your legs. A long distance runner is so happy that she found me that she told one of her running buddies that she has to go to Brazil.

Friday, July 2, 2010

There are certain parts that don't hurt quite as much.

Loved it when a girl told me she "wished it all felt like the ass."

Thursday, July 1, 2010

I am usually fairly polite when asking to wax your backside. But sometimes when I am busy, I become much more casual in my demeanor. So when I asked a girl to "give me your ass" and she says "what does that mean.....exactly?" I realize I should remain polite and be more descriptive when asking a woman to roll on her side so I can put hot wax between her butt cheeks.