Monday, April 30, 2012

A girl with a lot of genital piercings referred to her snatch as her jewelry box. Thank goodness she had a Brazilian or her jewels would have gotten all tangled in her pubic hair.

Sunday, April 29, 2012

A woman walked in the room and told me I should be really proud of her. She was with a new guy and was incredibly horny. She was tempted to shave but didn't. And, since she was hairy, she held off sleeping with him. I am proud of her restraint and her sense to not shave. I had to laugh that she came for a Brazilian first thing the next morning so she wouldn't have to behave any longer.

Saturday, April 28, 2012

Sometimes I wake up feeling very beat up from all of the ripping that I do, but I can't imagine doing anything else for a living. ~Tyson's Brazilian Sparring Partner~

Friday, April 27, 2012

A woman referred to me as her Diva of Depilatory Wax. I like that. ~your Brazilian Diva~

Thursday, April 26, 2012

If you pee after your Brazilian and the toilet paper sticks to you, you didn't follow the directions on the clean up station very well.

Wednesday, April 25, 2012

Someone told me that a technician at another salon stopped doing Brazilians after a woman crapped on the table. In all the years I have been doing this, I am happy to say that has never happened to me.

Tuesday, April 24, 2012

Rectal bleaching is a legitimate salon service that we do not offer at Mark & M.E. even though I have had requests for it. That doesn't mean is hasn't been mentioned by many women while I give them a Brazilian. One client, in fact, told me she used facial bleach on her rectum to see if it would lighten it up. It did nothing. Oh,bummer.

Monday, April 23, 2012

When a woman comes in with pubic hair growing down her legs, up her stomach, and basically everywhere, I don't think it is very sexy. So when I get rid of all the hair and leave a little landing strip or triangle, I feel very satisfied with my effort. I completely landscaped one of my clients and couldn't help but exclaim how cute she looked when I finished. Her response, "only you would say it's cute." ~your Brazilian Bikini Beautician~

Sunday, April 22, 2012

I had a girl from New York City come in for a Brazilian. She normally leaves the inside of the lips hairy because she thinks it is too painful to wax that part. I'm not a fan of hairy lips and I think that it is one of the least painful parts to wax, so you know I had to persuade her to take it all. As she was leaving, she said she wished she lived in Rochester because it was the first painless wax she had ever gotten. Go m.e.!

Saturday, April 21, 2012

A girl I used to wax in college drove in from Buffalo so she could get a Brazilian from me. The last salon she went to did not include the rectum with the Brazilian. If they did wax the backside, they called it an Australian because they were going down under. She didn't want to pay an extra $20 again for the technician to wax the entire pubic and rectal area. Not only was she humiliated when the girl put her on her hands and knees, she had a hard time holding herself up for nearly a half an hour. My rectal waxes are fast and free.

Friday, April 20, 2012

A friend of mine refers to being intimate as sexy time. I love the expression. In fact, I'd like everyone to have lots of sexy time with their silky snatches. ~Brazilian's Rock!"

Thursday, April 19, 2012

When you come in for a Brazilian Bikini Wax, it is important to remember this one thing. When I put wax on your lower abdominal area, don't sit up!

Wednesday, April 18, 2012

I got decorative glass panels to cover the fluorescent lights above one of my wax tables. Several women have commented how pretty and calming they are. One woman told me that although it was very peaceful, she knew I'd take that peaceful feeling away.
~your peaceful Brazilian wax chick~

Tuesday, April 17, 2012

You think a woman who performs Brazilians for a living has read and seen everything about them. Not so. Sunday night my husband and I saw the Vagina Monologues. I laughed a lot. I even cried several times. It was an emotional experience. If you haven't seen it yet, there are more performances around town. Check it out. All the proceeds go to a great cause. And I loved the fact that for two hours, all the women talked about was their Vagina's!

Monday, April 16, 2012

Part 3: Girl says she wants to kiss it. I say it's weird we can't reach it with our mouth. She sighs and says if she could reach it, she wouldn't need her boyfriend.
~the Brazilian conversations continue...~

Sunday, April 15, 2012

When the woman from yesterday said she wanted to kiss herself after her Brazilian, I made the comment that I always thought it was interesting that although God made us flexible human beings, he made it impossible for us to kiss our own genitalia.

Saturday, April 14, 2012

Most women are excited to get a Brazilian by me. In fact, yesterday a woman was so excited when I finished that she said she wanted to kiss it.

Friday, April 13, 2012

I'm sorry but I can't give you a Brazilian in one swipe. You have too many nooks and crannies.

Thursday, April 12, 2012

I was at the beach yesterday, and I couldn't help notice all of the women with red, rashy and irritated bikini areas. How is it possible that all women don't get Brazilian Bikini Waxes? Red bumps are not sexy. In fact, they need to be put away.

Wednesday, April 11, 2012

Orajel is not the best numbing agent to use before a Brazilian Wax. However, it could be a fun surprise to make you man's mouth numb. Just a thought.

Tuesday, April 10, 2012

If you think about it logically, a technician needs two arms to properly perform a Brazilian Bikini Wax. So when a girl hangs onto my right forearm throughout the service, it makes it harder for me to do the wax and it hurts more because I can't hold the skin taut. But the most annoying part of this scenario that occurred last week is that I walked away with bruises on my arm.

Monday, April 9, 2012

I love knowing that men read my blog. Several months ago I told you about a girl who came to Mark & M.E. to get a Brazilian and she had her man's baby butter all over her. A husband of one of my client's said I should call it Baby Batter since the consistency changes after it has mixed with the woman. Good point. Thank you.

Sunday, April 8, 2012

All he has to find is your one egg. Hope you landscaped so he could find it.
~your Brazilian Easter Bunny~

Saturday, April 7, 2012

Today is my 2 year anniversary blogging about beaves. I started the blog in hopes of getting my manuscript published. Sadly, nobody has come forward to help me. If I can get someone to do something with my book, I still plan to blog. It should be pretty obvious by now that I love to talk about twats, cantor about cootches, praise the puss and, ultimately, make you laugh.
~your Brazilian Goddess~

Friday, April 6, 2012

I write about more than Brazilians. Check out my latest article.

Thursday, April 5, 2012

Things can get sticky between a woman's legs during a Brazilian Wax. In order to get to certain parts, I put lotion on a woman to spread things apart. As I rubbed the lotion in, I removed the ball of her genital piercing. Another first.

Wednesday, April 4, 2012

Cheers to all of the women in their 60"s who are getting Brazilian Bikini Waxes!

Tuesday, April 3, 2012

Will the Easter Bunny be able to find the Golden Egg through the long, untamed brush? If not, time for a Brazilian.

Monday, April 2, 2012

A Brazilian Wax is not a four letter word. Just what comes out of the client's mouth is.

Sunday, April 1, 2012

Women will cease getting Brazilians as a way to protect their virtue. I had a woman hold off waxing her legs for the same reason. She referred to her leg hair as her force field.