Wednesday, July 31, 2013

In ancient times, it was a sign of purity for the aristocracy to remove all of their pubic hair. I don't know about you, but removing all of mine makes me have very impure thoughts. ~Ancient Brazilians~

Tuesday, July 30, 2013

If you're mean, one day karma will probably bite you in the ass. And if you're mean, I bet you have a hairy ass. ~waxing wisdom~

Monday, July 29, 2013

I think it would be tough to do Brazilians in South Carolina, because the locals seem to have such poor diets. Everything is fried, has cream or cheese sauces, and there is bacon on everything. I have never seen so many different fried chicken joints in my life. The flip side of the equation is that I have never met so many genuinely friendly people in my life either. Maybe fried chicken is the secret to a happy life.

Sunday, July 28, 2013

I was watching an elderly couple have breakfast at a Waffle House in South Carolina. The man was soaking his bread in his glass of water before eating it. That had to have made it easier to eat since he had no teeth. I couldn't help but think that the no teeth thing could be kind of fun for her. ~Southern Brazilian Humor~

Saturday, July 27, 2013

A girl didn't know where to put her hands during her Brazilian. She tried holding her low stomach but got wax on her hands, so she decided it was best to hold her boobs.

Friday, July 26, 2013

Twiddly dee Twiddly dum You got a Brazilian Now you'll get some

Thursday, July 25, 2013

After I finished popping one of the Brazilian Cherries, she got dressed, sat down to wait for her cousin, and yelled, "my pussy has a heartbeat!"

Wednesday, July 24, 2013

I popped 4 Brazilians Cherries yesterday. There was some yelling and lots of sweating, but, no worries, I used protection. I kept my black glove on the whole time.

Tuesday, July 23, 2013

I wanted to give a shout out to the client that noticed our online yellow page site was totally messed up. Days, hours, services,forms of payment, description....basically everything was wrong. It's a miracle you have found us! But I did check the reviews, and they were outstanding. My second shout out of the morning is to everyone who wrote such awesome things about us. Feeling very loved this morning. Thank you!! ~your Brazilian Servant~

Monday, July 22, 2013

If a woman has a hoo-ha, does that mean a man has a hoo-hang? ~Brazilian curiosity~

Sunday, July 21, 2013

When I encounter unpleasant lady parts, I just try to find some humor in it. ~my Brazilian coping mechanism~

Saturday, July 20, 2013

When I was in beauty school, I tried to get out of taking the wax class, because the idea of waxing any body part on someone scared the shit out of me. Oh, how things have changed.

Friday, July 19, 2013

By the time I roll you on your side, we have cemented our friendship. No worries, I have enough room in my heart for as many BFF's as I can find. ~your Brazilian Friend Forever~

Thursday, July 18, 2013

My license plate says wax it all. Someone thought it said wax tail. That works too.

Wednesday, July 17, 2013

A girl told me that she hated wearing a weave in the summer because they are so hot. I told her that is why she needed to keep up with the weave down below. ~Brazilian Advice~

Tuesday, July 16, 2013

Celebrate your Happy Hoo-Ha with a quick rip and a laugh.

Monday, July 15, 2013

A man was so nervous and sweaty during his first Brazilian that he rolled onto his side and right off the table.

Sunday, July 14, 2013


You buy a Groupon for a Brazilian. She burns your skin so badly that you can't exercise or play with it for several days and need to use Neosporin on it just to be comfortable enough to walk around. Once the burn subsides, you realize she broke your hair and now it's stubbly. That's what I call a deal.

Saturday, July 13, 2013

A dollar

A man came into the room with his wife for her wax. While her leg was in the air, he put a dollar on her stomach and told me it was all I can eat under a dollar.

Friday, July 12, 2013


Brazilians give you a sense of confidence that is hard to explain.

Thursday, July 11, 2013

scratch n sniff part 2

I think he'd prefer to sniff what is beneath your panties. ~Brazilian Wisdom~

Wednesday, July 10, 2013

scratch n sniff

During a bikini wax, I commented on how cute a girl's kiwi panties were. She said they were scratch and sniff that lost their sniff.

Tuesday, July 9, 2013


When a girl tells me she has a vajungle down there, I am tempted to put on my camouflage. ~working in the Brazilian Jungle~

Monday, July 8, 2013


I asked a girl how the dating scene was going. She said, don't you mean the f'ing scene? Brazilians are appropriate for all kinds of relationships.

Sunday, July 7, 2013

selectively deviant

I'm reading a book where a couple talk about being selectively deviant. I was thinking that it has to be more fun to be selectively deviant when you've had a Brazilian.

Saturday, July 6, 2013

another book?

I am actively working on my next book, and I didn't want to do another chapter on hygiene. If people don't stop presenting nasty situations in my face, however, I may not have a choice. ~your frustrated Brazilian author~

Friday, July 5, 2013

machete time

A woman walks in the room and tells me that before she takes her pants off, I should go get my machete. ~Brazilian Combat~

Thursday, July 4, 2013

Happy 4th!

On the 4th of July We celebrate we're free So enjoy the Brazilian You got at Mark & ME

Wednesday, July 3, 2013

surgery vs waxing

A client told me she would rather get a boob job then a Brazilian. I think both are good.

Tuesday, July 2, 2013

Love to rhyme!

Rain rain go away. I got a Brazilian and want to play.

Monday, July 1, 2013

Create your own fireworks without the dangerous sparks. Get a Brazilian.