A SassySnatch follower sent me a link to an article in Health magazine about different vagina practices and their safety issues. They talk about Vajazzling. I have never wanted to glue rhinestones on a freshly waxed pubic area, because you never know how'll you skin will react. The article agrees with me.

I'm still trying to wrap my head around this merkin thing. You can actually get one of these pubic wigs made out of human hair. That freaks me out a little. I think I would have to opt for synthetic.

Prostitutes would shave their entire pubic area to ensure no bugs were down there then put on a merkin, a pubic wig, for adornment. Seems counterproductive to me. ~your Brazilian Educator~

I was sitting on the beach talking to someone I had just met. Surprisingly, we started talking about Brazilians. She said that she studied women's history and read that prostitutes used to shave their entire pubic area to prove that they didn't have lice. I thought that was very interesting.

If it ain't bald when I meet it, it's bald when I leave it. ~Fondly, your Brazilian Bushwhacker~

Since my blog has been so well received the past couple years, I went ahead and published my manuscript. On Christmas Day, my book became available on Kindle. After a very loud scream, I started to cry. I put a ton of work into this project and it really happened. Seeing my name on Amazon is so surreal. The book was written to entertain and in some ways to educate, although there are times I know you will probably cringe. My dedication to pussies has finally paid off. The Happy Hoo-Ha is really happy!

Christmas is a time to love one another unconditionally, even if you did leave too much tinsel on your tree.

This is such a hectic time in our lives that I think we should all chill out and enjoy our Brazilians.

Mark is a hairdresser. He never learned to wax. Yesterday he gave me a Brazilian in less than 10 minutes. Once again I am truly baffled by all of the technicians that are specifically trained to do Brazilians and take forever to do one. It just doesn't make sense.

I feel like one of Santa's little helpers. ~your Brazilian Elf~

A guy told his girl he was going to play the song "Welcome To The Jungle" every time he took her pants off. It was time for a Brazilian.

Give your reindeer a smooth landing.

I left a Christmas Tree on the top of a woman's bikini line. It was very festive. I told her she needed to tell her man to leave a present under her tree.

This Christmas season hasn't been as crazy as usual, so I think I need to reiterate my favorite holiday mantra: You cannot have a happy holiday with a hairy hoo-ha.

I don't care if you have butt zits.

Don't know what to give your man for Christmas? Obvious to me. Get a Brazilian put a big, red bow on it. Beats a sweater.

One of my regular's was given 3 Groupons to another salon for Brazilians. When she walked in, no one acknowledged her for a solid 10 minutes. The room was small & sterile, like a gynecologist office. She had to ask the woman to put on gloves. The woman had to find some. She wasn't lying flat on a table; her upper body was elevated which doesn't work well at all. She was never asked to lift a leg or roll on her side. There was no clean up station. When my client asked what she could use to clean up, the woman told her to go to the drugstore and buy cortisone cream. After a very long, awkward service, she left sticky and hairy. She threw the other 2 Groupons out and came to see me yesterday. She said she was really happy to be back home again.

A new client told me how nice I was yesterday. I wondered what she thought a Brazilian Technician would be like. Did she think I was going to be mean?

Although I am a huge fan of vagina's, I saw a wireless mouse in the shape of a vagina that was pretty creepy. It's only redeeming factor was that it was hairless.

During this holiday season, the only thing that should be hairy is Santa's beard. ~your Brazilian Elf~

A girl called for an appointment for a Brazilian, and I told her to come right over. She told me she couldn't be there for an hour, because she needed to find her leather strap for her mouth.

A woman in her 60's came in for a wax. SHe was going down south to visit her boyfriend. When I finished her Brazilian, she sat up and said Happy Hanukkah to him!

You don't have to worry about saying anything stupid during your Brazilian that will get you in my book, because it has already been published!

A husband told his wife she really needed to get a Brazilian, because she looked like Buckwheat with a scissor hole.

A little bit of tinsel on the top of a tree can be pretty, but a lot of it is just plain messy.

I started this blog 977 days ago, because I have a lot of funny things to say about vagina's and I was hoping that some day I would get my manuscript published. Well, for all of my supporters out there, I am psyched to say that I finally did get it published and I hope all of you will go to the following link and get a copy. Let the hoo-ha reign! https://www.createspace.com/3999717

You can't have a Happy Hanukkah with a Hairy Hoo-Ha either, so get your Brazilian today!

There's three weeks until Christmas. Still don't know what to get your man? Give him a vacation to the sandy beaches of Brazil.

Camel toe is a bizarre expression. What makes it even more horrifying is when it's bumpy because it's covered in hair.

The other day I was hanging out with a friend and having a few cocktails. He told me that he was very thankful that I turned his wife onto Brazilian Waxing. As he was rubbing his cheeks with his hands, he repeatedly told me how much better it felt on his face.

Many women participated in the "No Shave November" because they didn't like their men with hair on their face. They retaliated by letting their hair grow as well, just not on their face. Well November is over, so get all your hairy bushes in to see me today! ~your Brazilian Bush Master~