A man on the radio today said the penis has no conscience. I know when a penis meets one of my Brazilian clients, it most definitely does not.

Yesterday a manatee swam up to my kayak. As I was petting its back, it rolled over so I could pet its belly. It was a mommy and had a baby nearby in the water. I couldn't help but notice that manatees don't need Brazilians. Her lady parts were bald.

When some clients come in for Brazilians, they say they are headed to Brazil. I love the idea of our salon being referred to as a tropical paradise in an exotic country.

My daughter is going on a bullet train today. It made me think of how a man acts like the conductor of a bullet train when his woman gets a Brazilian.

I talk about different names women call their lady parts in The Happy Hoo-Ha. A woman told me I needed to add her name to my list. She calls it her Bajingo. I told her she had a bushy Bajingo. When I finished, I told her she had a beautifully bald Bajingo. So here's a shout out to all those bald Bajingo's out there.

A new Brazilian inquiry said her boyfriend is tired from the chaffing by her porcupine hoo-ha. Amen to change!

Some people call it Mark & ME, some call it the ripping station It's all good.

I told an 80 year old woman that The Happy Hoo-Ha was a book about vaginas. She said that was wonderful, because we all have one.

Chicks dig BOB.

If you don't have a special someone to enjoy your Brazilian, you can always turn to BOB, your battery operated boyfriend.

Since I cannot afford a publicist, I have been brainstorming different ways to market the The Happy Hoo-Ha. I was thinking of putting something on U-Tube. Any thoughts?

Speaking of educational... a client told me that her friend didn't know she had three holes. Sad that people don't know their body better. Maybe the next edition of The Happy Hoo-Ha should be The Helpful Hoo-Ha.

I have had several people tell me that they thought The Happy Hoo-ha was educational. Who would have thought my lady part ramblings could be viewed that way?

When your hair gets tangled in your husband's clippers, you are past due for a Brazilian.

Occasionally, I teach private classes on waxing. One of my protégées used to wax Brazilians on men as well as women. Now that she is pregnant, however, she doesn't wax men any more. She had to stop, because a few men have kicked her in the stomach and she decided it wasn't worth the risk.

The article on crabs said that one third of the UK population would personally experience an infestation of pubic lice in their lifetime. Fortunately, Brazilians are changing that statistic. I still, however, have no desire to travel there.

A client sent me an article that said that crabs have become an endangered species since the popularity of Brazilians. I really AM saving the world!

I heard about a dermatologist who told his patient that he didn't like the way the pubic area looked when it was shaved. He told her it looked like bacon.

If you read The Happy Hoo-Ha and liked it, do me a favor and go to Amazon and like the book on its website. I'm hoping it will help my sales and my exposure. Thank You! ~your Brazilian Author~

Brazilians aren't that scary. Don't psych yourself out.

Someone commented that I have a lot of big girl stories and she, as a thin girl, felt left out. It is just that my bigger girls often make references to their size that are funny. My skinny girls share other stories that are unrelated to their size but equally as funny. ~your Brazilian storyteller~

I had just finished a big girl for the first time and while she was lying on her side, she looked over her shoulder at me and said "now you can say you've waxed the biggest ass in Rochester." I told her I've waxed bigger. And I have.

Even when I travel to other cities across the country, I meet women who have had nightmare Brazilian experiences. It isn't rocket science people!

Brazilians make you feel bodacious!

Brazilians make you feel naughty.

Brazilians make you feel confident.

You don't have to be embarrassed if your knee hits my boob considering my hands are all over your vag.

A woman came in for her 2nd Brazilian. She said that she loved how it felt like she had no panties on even when she did.

Laser hair removal isn't permanent for most people. If you have left me for laser, your treatments are over, some of your hair has started to come back and now you're not sure what to do, please come back and see me. I have countless clients who have returned to waxing after a series of laser treatments. Some people have the same amount of hair from when they started. Other people have significantly less hair, but they are disappointed that they are not bald. In these cases, since there is less hair, the waxing doesn't even hurt at all anymore.

If your chick gets a Brazilian, I wouldn't mess with her.

You could always try a new look for the new year, like a martini glass, soul patch, or a racing stripe, as long as you pay some attention to the area. All body hair needs some grooming. Period.