If you haven't heard the expression "blue waffle," it is a disease that affects the color and shape of the vagina. The pictures online are horrifying. One of my Brazilian clients informed me of this malady. Let our breakfast revelations continue.

A client told me about a student who got in trouble for calling someone a twat waffle. I looked the expression up and it can be used as a noun to call someone an idiot. It can also refer to a vagina that is so shriveled up that it looks like a defrosted waffle. Even though I find that definition pretty disturbing, I am always grateful for the education I receive when giving someone a Brazilian.

For those of you who have read The Happy Hoo-ha, I talk about how I wax every size, shape and color women. That is part of what makes my job so interesting. The other day, I waxed a 6'4" woman who was longer then the table and then a 4'9" woman who looked like a midget in comparison.

A girl had her yearly gynecological exam then came in to see me for a Brazilian. She told me she was having a cooter abuse day.

Women like f" buddies because it is fun and there is little commitment involved. It is supposed to be less complicated then a relationship. But when a man gets so upset that he couldn't get the woman to climax that he punches a hole through her wall, this is sounding pretty complicated and needs to end. ~your Brazilian advice girl~

When your husband calls your vagina a fur-gina, it's time for a Brazilian.

Woman can be very particular about what kind of purse they carry and what they put in it. So when a woman referred to her lady parts as her pocketbook, I can only think she is reinforcing the fact that her hoo-ha is one of her prized possessions and she is particular about what she puts in it.